Getting fired for surfing the net was great. It meant that I could spend all day everyday writing about everything I ever did, like today I patted a dog and as soon as I had I knew I was going to write about it, heck, I might even organise a coffee morning so I can talk about it to utter strangers.
Anyway, like always, I digress. Now that my previous employers regret thinking I'm a slob who is on the internet everyday they are paying me to give a talk about stuff. This is great, it reaffirms that being unemployed can actually get you employment. If I hadn't had 24 hours a day everyday to do utter Jack then I wouldn't have the time to wonder around the world writing about every scene in my life. This is quite valuable as an earning model. It means that whilst everyone is really busy doing stuff like work they don't have time to learn about Second Life and every website that is ever published. Since time is on my side I can be the quick informative fix and solve this problem for them.
Now however we have a bigger problem. I almost can't be arsed surfing the net anymore learning about new and wonderful things such as how to get laid in Second Life 2 (for adults only - I set it up myself by cracking the Sims adult version and Second Life by merging the two to create an awe inspiring adult, virtual, technosexual, web 2.0 .....thing, it's great). God I'm digressing AGAIN, I'm so rubbish. So, I can't be arsed anymore, I'd rather just sit in a coffee shop and grow more stubble.
So write in with what you think is interesting for my next talk. The last one went a bit badly, I stood in silence for an hour and afterwards when asked why I did that I tried to make out it was a media neutral stunt but I don't think they believed me. So, help make me richer.
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